VCCA Home Forums GENERAL DISCUSSION General Discussions Oxymoron's

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we
ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find
the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same
thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are
already there?

10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for
sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after
light"?

12 Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected
expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy"opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do
it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience
sitting?

18. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ?

These are questions that may stimulate the thinking process but I would not call them oxymorons, by definition. Beamer

Beamer,
I agree. Jumbo shrimp is a better example.

It was sent to me in an email by an English teacher so I would trust she is familiar with the definition.
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Oxymoron

Well Hummmm, let's ant-ill-ize this: It was sent to me in an email by an English teacher so I would trust she is familiar with the definition......
well, so much for doing an ant-owl-iza-tion.... Computer says "don't compute!" try again...maybe the items in the posting are really paradoxes?

I do think that a grouping of sentances must be classified as something of a grander scale than an oxy-moron.

Defination: The most common form of oxymoron involves an adjective-noun combination of words that is a figure of speech that combines normally contradictory terms. They appear in a range of contexts, from inadvertent errors such as extremely average , to deliberate puns like same difference .
Examples: Dark Sunshine, Happy Depression, Amazing Dullness, Dynamic Equilibrium.

Maybe it was intended to be more of a "Seinfeld" type of thing.

Hum....I always thought that an "Oxymoron" was a moron that breathed oxygen!

Well Dawg, that sounds reasonable......

One of the worst ever thoughts for we fathers who had daughters who were not yet wed:

"A little bit pregnant"

When the CCA proclaims a 'new' car to the club

"A New Classic"

Others. And the list can go on and on:

"Assistant Supervisor"

"Authentic Replica"

"Amicable Divorce"

And one that I'm not going to list; but one of you retired military guys can, if you care to.....

Bill.

More oxymorons:

State worker
small crowd
sanitary landfill
tight slacks
Microsoft Works

I was wondering the origin of caddywampus.

Roger

42bill, I am retired military and not at all bashful so I will say it: Army intelligence!! Beamer

Something we in this hobby come across quite a bit...

"Loose fit" and "tight fit".

[quote=Beamer] 42bill, I am retired military and not at all bashful so I will say it: Army intelligence!! Beamer [/quote

Sounds better to me than Military intelligence! SEMPER FI!

MrMack, Do you remember that back when Coca Cola put the bottling plant's city on the bottom of the bottle? Well, for those going to Marine Base's, they put "Open Other End."

"Army Intelligence?" You started this.

Airborne!

Charlie
U.S. Army (Retired)

Aw Heck, Man I owe you...I remember finding a bottle with OPENOTHEREND and I spent a half of a day looking on the map for that city. I finally found it in California! I remember when we were at a Navy Air Base stageing for Cuba. The navy PA system would ding the bell 2 bells, 3 bells so forth and then announce it was 1300 or 2100 and then when we were getting ready to depart, the PA anouncer said It is 1400, "for you Marines that means that the little hand is on 2 and the big hand is on 12"! We all were so grateful since our Mickey Mouse watches didn't have a 1300 or a 1400 and we were not sure what time that we should get up, to S.S. & S and fall out for PT before breakfast.....at 0500, I never did understand them swabbies and their ding-dong bell time keeping system or their bell bottom Britches, with the trap door in front!

SEMPER FI!

While I was in Iraq there were more than a few times we would come under mortar or rocket fire. About 5-10 minutes into the attack a siren would go off for maybe 30 seconds. It was followed by "The Big Voice" which would clearly state, "SEEK SHELTER. SEEK SHELTER. WE ARE UNDER ATTACK"

Umm, thanks for the warning big voice.

Maybe Big Voice had to get into the survival mode deep in the Big Voice bunker, before he could give the alarm...better late than never......

There ya go.....

Military Intelligence....

Give the warning AFTER the bombs are falling!!!

Holy Crap!!!!!

I was in a building that took a couple of hits once. It was not fun. Never again did I go in a bunker or building when we were under attack. Not because I was brave but because I was afraid. I was scared chitless to be inside when we came under attack.

That`s what we need here, is lesschit!!!!

hoppy

How about: "Very Unique" and "half-off?"

The rest of this you please ignore the following unless you are interested in ship's bells that MrMack mentioned. You are forewarned.

MrMack, I was hoping that a navy person would weigh in and explain the ship's bells to you. Didn't happen. Being a fan of Patrick O'Brian's "Master and Commander" series and not understanding some of the naval terminology he used, I bought a book by Dean King, and others, called "A Sea of Words." Here is what it says about ship's bells:

"The system of telling time on board ship. The ship bell, struck every half hour, indicates by the number of strokes the number of half-hours of the watch that has elapsed. The striking of eight bells indicates midnight. After midnight, one bell is struck at 12:30 A.M., two bells at 1:00 A.M.,three bells at 1:30 A.M., and so forth until eight bells are struck again at 4:00 A.M., at which point the above progression is repeated until eight bells are again struck at 8:00 A.M. In this way eight bells ring every four hours around the clock."

Watch:

"The period of time that each division of a ship's company alternately remains on deck, usually four hours, except for the Dog-Watches, which are two hours each and serve to prevent the same watch being kept by the same men every day. The names of the watches are:

Middle (grave-yard watch): midnight to 0400 hours
Morning: 0400 to 0800 hours
Forenoon: 0800 to 1200 hours
Afternoon: 1200 to 1600 hours
First dog: 1600 to 1800 hours
Second, or last, dog: 1800 to 2000 hours
First: 2000 to midnight"

I don't know how much of the above this holds true today. As some say, "Take it with a grain of salt."

Now for those who wonder why this wasn't explained to MrMack and his marine buddies on board, is anybody's guess. Army theory is that for the navy to explain it to the marines it would have taken the entire voyage, even if circumnavigating the whole earth, and an annoyance to both parties.

(Remember, Mr. Mack you started this.)

Best,
Charlie

Charlie,
Thanks for the long winded explaination, I think that I understand the system but thought it would be just as easy for everyone to carry or wear a watch.

Fortunately Charlie,I never had to rely on the Navy surface folks for transportation, several of us Marines were able to fly some very uncomplicated aircraft, such as the C-130 Herc. and we were quite satisfied with that arrangment and the time keeping system of 0-2400 hours. Count on the Navy to complicate even the simple matter of timekeeping

Well, they did have great steaks. If It wasn't for the U.S. Navy in VN, we would have never had anything to consume that didn't taste like our bodies had worked on it for 48 hours first. We traded stuff with them to get steaks whenever we could. Seldom, but a real treat when we did.

Semper Fi and Airborne,
Charlie

BTW: I grew up in Jacksonville, NC and had three sisters marry U.S. Marines from Camp Lejeune. Great guys all.

Hey Mack, as an old salt myself, can you fetch yourself a 100' of shoreline to secure your weekend project?

Oh, and don't forget to stop by the engine room and pick up 2 buckets of steam!

Thanks, have fun sleeping in the sand!

RayG, alias; "CS3Cook-Ski", USS Biddle (DLG-34)

Charlie's exactly right. We Navy ship-drivers know that it could take several months to get the Marines to understand basic timekeeping, so we don't even try to explain it to them. Every time it starts to look like they're beginning to understand, someone throws a can of shoe polish on the table and all the jarheads are gone for a week!

Maybe we should try the "big hand / little hand" approach in teaching the Marines to tell time.

All the Best,

Chip (CAPT, USN (Ret.) and 26-year destroyerman)

PS -- And when it comes time to fight, I want the Marines on my side!